My Italian Adventures
by JCWarriorCats
Summary: "A month ago, my American class took a trip to Italy. Long story short, I was left in the gift shop, lost all my luggage and money, wandered and cried in the streets until Feliciano found me and took me home like a stray kitten. And bippity boppity boo, until I could get back home I was the third roommate in this Italian abode." Please R&R rated T for language and adult themes


_"Why so serious? So raise your glass if you are wrong! In all the right ways! All my underdogs! We… will never be! Never be! Anything but-"_

**CRASH! **

I pulled the pillow back over my head. Oh how I hated mornings. They should be illegal or something.

"Hey! Jessica! Why are you a sleeping huh? It's a beautiful day!" the high pitched Italian voice of Feliciano penetrated my ear drums and I wept silently inside. I had to get up now.

"Five more minutes mommy." I grumbled, snuggling farther under my comfy blankets.

"But Ludwig made bacon for breakfast."

"BACON!" I screamed, popping up and running down the stairs.

A month ago, my American class took a trip to Italy. Long story short, I was left in the gift shop, lost all my luggage and money, wandered and cried in the streets until Feliciano found me and took me home like a stray kitten. And bippity boppity boo, until I could get back home I was the third roommate in this Italian abode. You've already met Feliciano, but now I must tell you about the second roommate. Ludwig is a German man that is Italy's 'partner' (he refuses to admit otherwise but Feli has told me some stories. He he.) and was not thrilled when Feli brought me home but got used to me I guess. (He doesn't make me do drills anymore…)

"Morning Ludwig!" I called, plopping into a seat so fast I almost skidded over onto the ground. Four plates lay on the table so that we could pick what we wanted and how much we wanted. One had eggs, another sausage, then toast, and finally my precious bacon. I automatically reached over and my hand was smacked. I pouted.

"Morning Jessica but wait for Feliciano." Ludwig rolled his eyes at me while speaking with his thick German accent. I stared at the bacon hungrily. Both of these two were good cooks. (Lucky for me because I would break the kitchen)

"Hey Jessica! What did you do to your alarm clock?" Feliciano appeared with my recently broken device. I laughed half heartedly.

"Uh… It was totally an accident." I tried, biting my bottom lip. Germany dropped the fork in his hand as he looked at the demolished machinery. His eye twitched and the look of rage came over his face.

"Jessica!" and the yelling begins.

"So what do you want to do today Jessica?" Feliciano asked me. I looked at him and thought a moment.

"Oh! But I thought you and Ludwig were going on a date later." I reminded him.

"We aren't dating!" Ludwig called from the kitchen. I rolled my eyes. He was in denial. That must feel great to Feliciano. (Heavy sarcasm intended) Then I had an idea.

"Hey Feli! I know what we can do today!" I chimed, coming back in.

"Pasta?"

"Nooooo…." I leaned in and began to whisper. "Wanna make Ludwig jealous?" I winked. He cocked his head to the side then smiled.

"Sure!" then after a few seconds. "How do we do that?" Oh the obliviousness…

"Go flirt with some girls, maybe bring some home? He'll go crazy." I suggested.

"Oooooooh I see." He nodded vigorously, excited. Then he stopped whispering and cried. "Wanna be my wingman?" he grinned. I thought about that a moment.

"Wingman?" a shadow fell over my face then I stood up so fast the chair fell over behind me as I yelled. " Sure!" I grinned. This could be fun.

"…"

"…"

"You want a fake mustache?"

"HELL YEAH!"

I stroked my fake mustache proudly. Apparently Feliciano's brother Romano had used this in a failed attempt to make Ludwig look like a moron. (He looked stupid instead.) My hair was already short so I put on a suit and I looked like a short, American boy. Feliciano was dressed sharp beside me, though as far as I had seen, most Italians are.

"So where are the ladies Jessica?" Feliciano asked.

"I am not Jessica I am Seth! And I don't know this is your country." I pointed out.

"Ah you're right. Hmm…" He looked around for some girls and spotted some a while later. "Look!"

"Well done Yeller!" I complimented and looked the girls over. They'll do.

"So now what?"

"You are the king of flirting, why are you asking me?" I groaned. I'd only attempted picking up a girl once before and I had struck out. Mostly because I was a girl too but you get the picture.

"I don't usually go and talk to cute girls anymore." He admitted.

"Why not?"

"Lugwig."

"Right." I decided it was up to me. I walked over to the girls. I wrapped an arm around one of their shoulders. "Hey ladies, how's it hanging? You look pretty lonesome." I used my exotic americaness to my advantage. No matter who you were, you had to love people with accents, and though I didn't know I had one, I'd been told that I do. The girls giggled at me.

"What a cute accent!" One of them squealed. "Where are you from?"

"America!"

"Wow!" they gasped in awe. I waved suttily to Feliciano for him to come over. He came like the dog I called him earlier.

"Hey Feli! There you are! These girls seem awfully interested in me." I pretended, winking. They laughed more.

"Whos you're cute friend?" the other girl asked, looking at Feliciano.

"This is Feliciano, but ladies we don't have the pleasure of knowing your names yet." I kept going, waiting for him to pop in.

"I'm Adriana!" the first girl with light brown hair told us.

"And I'm Yola." The short brown haired one responded.

"Lovely names."

"What about you?"

"Oh me? I'm Seth Perkins." I lied, outstretching my hand.

"Well Seth, want to go get some coffee with us? You're friend can come." Adriana offered.

"No no sorry ladies, I already have a girlfriend. Feliciano on the other hand is just dying for some loving if you're willing to trade." I gestured to him and he waved. They changed their interest and nodded.

"Ok! Where do you want to go Feliciano?" Yola questioned.

"Feli lets show them our apartment." I said with meaning.

"Sure thing!"

"Where have you guys been? I've been calling you two for hour-"

"Ludwig we have guests!" I interrupted, shoving him into the back room. "Feli and I brought home some girls ok? I'm called Seth and I'm not I repeat not a girl." I explained.

"Wh-what? Feliciano brought home girls?" he stuttered. Yes plan was working!

"Yeah! You don't mind right? I mean, you aren't dating or anything." I quoted, smirking.

"Jessica! What did you-"

"Ludwig where are you? Come meet our guests!" Feliciano called from the living room. Ludwig clenched his teeth angrily.

"Whats this Ludwig? You aren't jealous are you?" I gasped, acting so fake.

"…Nope… not at all… I mean I'm not his boyfriend so it shouldn't matter…" he growled. He was going to crack. I could tell.

"Ok. I'll just go tell Feliciano that we can continue on with our fun. Who knows, we may get luckier." I sang, pushing it. Germany pushed me aside and walked into the living room.

"Feliciano can I talk to you for a second?" Ludwig snapped urgently. Feliciano looked at him questioningly, then saw my expression behind Ludwig and he smiled.

"Ok!" The two disappeared upstairs.

"So Seth, how long will you be in Italy?"

"Who are you talking to?"

"What?"

"My name isn't Seth." I pulled off the fake mustache. "I am Jessica! And you have been punked!"

"You aren't Ashton Kutcher!" they screamed.

"Oh but monamee does it matter?" I asked all creepy like. They took the hint and bolted for the door. I closed it behind them.

I didn't go check on Germany or Italy, but I did notice that they didn't come out of Germany's room for the rest of the night. I grinned to myself as I put in my Junjou Romantica cd. All was well again, and I know I would get Germany out of denial someday.


End file.
